Many people have made movies and television shows about Hercules, the son of the Greek god Zeus and a mortal woman. We've seen Hercules joking around with Bruce Campbell, we've seen him beating up James Woods. Last year, Hollywood gave us a fresh take on the legend. What if the Greek Gods lived to this day, but didn't know it was the current day? Also what if Mount Olympus was right over Burbank, California? Then you would have a pretty bad movie, all things considered.
The movie picks up with Hercules sitting around Mount Olympus, talking with his fellow gods. It should be noted that Socrates is now a Greek God. All of the sudden Marduk (played by Paul Wight aka The Big Show) arrives and starts trying to pick a fight with Zeus. Marduk is a Babylonian god who feels the need to hang around Mt. Olympus constantly.(We later find out his house is a flaming crap-hole.)
Hercules takes advantage of the fight to escape to Earth. Once in Burbank, he begins to have a series of wacky adventures. He has trouble fitting in, but eventually is befriended by a boy about his age. The kid's mother decides that she should take care of Hercules and send him to school, despite him throwing her date into their swimming pool for some reason.
Soon Zeus realizes the only way to contact his son is by toilet phone. No really. Anyways, Hercules answers the call on the tele-john and finds out that he can only waste his strength three times before he's only as strong as a normal person. He must choose to be a mortal or a god. Also there's a bet with Marduk and Olympus is at stake, but no pressure.
Marduk cheats on the bet by becoming a private coach for the school Hercules is going to, and creating teams consisting of Hercules versus the rest of the school. There's a competition, a conspiracy, and some really bad special effects.
I won't spoil the secret ending of the movie, but I will give you a final warning not to buy or rent this unless you are planning to give it the MST3K treatment. If you are looking for a good Hulk Hogan movie (and I can't imagine that you are) you would be much better off watching his cameo in Gremlins II.
Hercules takes advantage of the fight to escape to Earth. Once in Burbank, he begins to have a series of wacky adventures. He has trouble fitting in, but eventually is befriended by a boy about his age. The kid's mother decides that she should take care of Hercules and send him to school, despite him throwing her date into their swimming pool for some reason.
Soon Zeus realizes the only way to contact his son is by toilet phone. No really. Anyways, Hercules answers the call on the tele-john and finds out that he can only waste his strength three times before he's only as strong as a normal person. He must choose to be a mortal or a god. Also there's a bet with Marduk and Olympus is at stake, but no pressure.
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| Do you think the Liquid Plumber can take out the Hulkster? |
I won't spoil the secret ending of the movie, but I will give you a final warning not to buy or rent this unless you are planning to give it the MST3K treatment. If you are looking for a good Hulk Hogan movie (and I can't imagine that you are) you would be much better off watching his cameo in Gremlins II.
Bonus clips(There is sound but its very quiet):
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